Mixed Hope and Fear . . .

What an interesting mix of emotions I have right now!

First, the most notable emotions regarding the election of Barack Obama.  I am SO amazed!  As my boy and I were driving to dinner, I began to think about how I’d feel when I got the news.  And suddenly, reality began to dawn.  This would be the FIRST Black President of the United States!  I could feel tears welling up even then.  But then . . . then when I finally got the news.  I was amazed, overwhelmed, and simultaneously incredulous.  I couldn’t believe it.  Tears just ran down my face.  I can’t even describe the pride I feel as an African-American.  I’m not sure anyone can fully appreciate how this must truly feel to my community, and I’m not sure words are adept enough to make their meaning known.  But it’s BIG.  SO BIG!

I’ve cried no fewer than 4 times today as I’ve stopped to reflect on the import of it all.

Yet, I found it hard to sleep last night.  Part of it was just being very hot in my room, but I also know that California’s Proposition 8 was heavily on my mind.  The first thing I did when I woke up this morning was to check the tally.  Only 87% of the precints had been counted at that point, but it wasn’t looking good.  I’m very, very sad that Prop 8 passed.  It was really not a good night at all for gays and lesbians.  The joy of the fruition of racial equality was smoothly blunted by the sorrows of sexual and romantic inequality that continues to arise across the nation

And then, I got into work, and in my message box was something good.  My research project from my residency is close to being accepted by the journal Pharmacotherapy!  There were apparently 3 reviewers.  I only got comments from the first 2 though.  The second guy ripped my project up!  That butthead recommended the study not be published!  (I have a strong suspicion that this person works for – or gets a significant paycheck from – one of the bigger Drug Industry companies.)  But the first guy was a lot more reasonable, and I’m pretty sure that I can respond adequately to his concerns.  So this is looking very good right now.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed! 

So yeah, a mixed bag there.  Anywho, I’m bouncing!